All Up in My Grillz

04/15/2008

Grillz were originally known as a status symbol of money and success. Nowadays, anyone from a hip hop Emcee to your Grandma is looking to buy a grill and there are a variety of styles to choose from. Rapper Flavor Flav has won our attention with his mouth full of glittering gold. Rumor also has it that Johnny Depp was sporting his grill at the Oscars. After Nelly’s single, “Grillz”, was released in 2005, mouths full of platinum and gold were popping up everywhere. Unfortunately, not everyone can pull off this latest jewelry fad. Maybe it is having the right attitude and confidence to make a certain style work. Please put your money where your mouth is as I introduce to you THE 25 WORST GRILLZ on the web.

Grillz? Check. Tattoos? Check. Big medallion chain? Check. Next up—nipple ring! Who left him alone with the Sharpie marker in the first place?

I’d like to pull those bandanas down further to cover their unsightly Grillz.

If you’re going to attempt the grillz look, please don’t hide behind a poster. Sport the real deal bling bling and be proud!

If you are going to stare directly at my grill, you must wear protective eyewear.

“Frosty the Snowman, was a jolly happy soul, with a corn cob pipe and a button nose, and two eyes made out of coal.” When did we substitute the corn cob pipe with Grillz? Let’s stick to tradition, if only for the children.

The Santa that came down my chimney never had a mullet or sunglasses. He also didn’t have gold Grillz. Don’t tell my mom and dad because I swore I was sleeping and not peeking downstairs when he came on Christmas Eve.

Are those Grillz or the symbol for Batman? Can you signal the Bat Mobile with those things?

St. Patrick’s Day is around the corner but how are you expected to enjoy a pint of Guinness with these colorful Grillz in the way? Where’s me pot of gold, lassie?

Not a whole lot to say about this one, except NEXT!

It looks like someone headed for the border and enjoyed a black bean burrito. Either that or somebody please get this Wookiee some Efferdent for his Grillz.

These Grillz will have you cuffed and seated in the backseat of the Fashion Police mobile. You could always use your Grillz to post bail.

When it is difficult to distinguish whether or not you are sporting Grillz or you are suffering from tooth decay, best not to wear anything at all.

There is way too much going on here! Red-orange lips and gold Grillz clash! Don’t try this at home.

With Grillz like these, you’ll definitely be behind the scenes. They have a name for that--radio personality.

He almost fooled me. First glimpse, I thought rapper Eminem . . . then I realized how cheap and generic his Grillz appeared.

I’ve come to the realization why everyone wearing Grillz in this blog is so full of angst: they look like crap!

Isn’t there an age restriction for wearing Grillz? If you don’t have all your adult teeth yet, then no Grillz for you!

All I want for Christmas is my front Grillz, ma!

Even three young, attractive girls can’t pull this look off. I’m sure they’ve frightened away any potential prospects.

Do you know what would look much more pleasant? An orange peel in her mouth.

Where are your manners? Always remove your Grillz before eating.

Utterly ridiculous. It reminds me of the days when wearing colored rubber bands on your braces was considered “cool”.

I know Shirley Temple never had Grillz. I don’t think she would’ve won the hearts of so many Americans had she been tap dancing while flashing her Grillz.

“I’m sorry Officer, I couldn’t see because of the glare from my Grill!”

4 comments »

Comment by yo
On 4/16/2008 2:52:00 PM Cool blog! Captions on pics were funny!! Grills, come on!!

Comment by Alejandro
On 4/26/2008 4:27:00 PM Pretty funny blog. you have some pretty funny pictures too

Comment by allana
On 6/8/2008 5:28:00 PM wow thats pimped out

Comment by jess
On 7/17/2008 6:23:00 AM i always wondered what the big deal is with 'grillz' nelly looked good with them.. then white boys gotta start wearin them... i dated a dentist who has 'grillz' made for clients (does a plaster mold for teeth and has the client pick out which 'grill' he wants and it comes in in 2-4 weeks..) he says he makes good money from it, and that some guys pay $3,000+ for just a top set of grillz...come on, use the money for something else, like maybe child support